Show #14 – “Community College Tour” – Widener University

And I thought Pitt-Tit was a bad name for an institution.  Widener U?  Sounds more like a command.  On my way to this school I passed a SUBWAY sandwich shop.  This one took their name a little too literally…

Hey look~  It’s a subway SUBWAY!

Everyone knows that I order a variation of the ‘Veggie Delight’ on a regular basis.  Allow me to give you official name, motto, and recipe.  Try ordering it for lunch today!

“THE KVON FOOTLONG”:
More than a mouthful, fills you up every time, and good for you too!

  • Flat Bread / 2 Slices of Cheese / Some Marinara Sauce / Olive / Spinach / Tomato / Bell Pepper
  • *THEN TOAST IT*
  • Now Add: Lettuce / More Olives (since they try to jip you) / Yellow Peppers / Cilantro / & More Olives
  • Mustard / Vinegar / Pepper / & finally, Oregano

At this point the SUBWAY lady hates your guts, but too bad.  Now hand her $5, grab your sammy, and get the hell out of there before she changes her mind.

Now it’s time to take my footlong to Widener.  I arrived and they had the show set up in a theater.  Huge stage, perfect sound/lights and a lot of students packed in.  After the show I took questions from the crowd where one student asked me to come back to his dorm and kick his roommates a$$ for him.  I asked why and he said “The guy talks too much, he’s always keeping me awake.”  I asked “What’s your roommate doing right now?”  The reply, “Sleeping!”  Well, no wonder!  You guys are on two different schedules.  He’s sleeping all day so he can keep you up with talking all night.  It’s only week 2 of school and I’m sure they’ll get it all figured out.  But if I hear on the news that someone was killed at Widener U., something tells me I’ll know exactly who did it.

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